Recipe #1: Spaghetti O's

Ah spaghetti o's. How you disgust me. You're slimy, salty, sweet, oily and taste of preservatives. Yum, preservatives. For some reason though you taste fantastic on the playa! Unfortunately you only taste fantastic on the playa...

During my final shopping excursion in Reno before heading out to TTITD I went to Sak 'N Save and found $.88 cans of generic spaghetti o's, spaghetti and meatballs, etc. I had to do it. A few years ago I was very ill at Burning Man (I blame the playa diet where you eat once every three days) and some sweet soul in my camp offered me a can of spaghetti o's. I initially said "Hell no, those things are gross." After some contemplation I got off of my high horse and took him up on the offer. Oh my freakin' lord, I had never had anything so delicious! I ate it straight out of the can with a spork.

Well once again I went on the playa diet and didn't touch a single can of anything I had bought. In fact, I think the only thing I ate of mine was some jalapeno cheese bread before it went stale. You know, by the third day. Oh yes, and of course I had a fried pickle.

Now I'm stuck with six cans of the disgustingly sweet, orange, blobish crap. What to do...?

I searched online and found this recipe: http://www.mommyskitchen.net/2009/03/super-easy-sapaghetti-os-casserole.html

I know I know, yes, I actually looked at a "mommy" site. I figured it would be a little difficult to find an adult site with a recipe for spaghetti o's. I was right. However, this recipe was fantastic with just a little tweaking to my like. Here's how I did it:

What you need:
One can cheap ass tomato flavored MSG ridden pasta rings (aka, spaghetti o's)
1/2 lb lean ground turkey
Parmesan cheese
Reduced fat shredded cheese (I used mozzarella)
1-Onion, chopped
1-Heaping tablespoon of chopped garlic, equivalent to approx. 10 cloves. What? I like garlic.
Salt
Pepper
Garlic Powder
Olive oil

Okay, this is so simple I think my sister could do it and that dumb ass once burned soup. Not cream soup either.

1) In a skillet, cook the turkey in olive oil with an entire chopped onion, the chopped garlic, salt/pepper/garlic powder to taste. Why the garlic powder if I'm putting in chopped garlic? Because I like garlic, remember? Keeps the vampires away. And by that I mean the teenage twits who are in love with all that vampire crap.

2) Dump the turkey mixture in an 8x8 greased baking pan. Top with a handful of parmesan and a handful of shredded cheese. I love cheese. If a recipe calls for a cup of cheese, use two. That's also why I use reduced fat cheese.

3) Open your can of gelatinous, fake tomato flavored, FD&C Red 40 pasta rings and dump on top of the turkey/cheese. Make sure you use a spatula so you get all of those oily clumps out. Top with another handful of parmesan and shredded cheese.

4) Bake at 350 for 35-40 minutes or until the top layer of cheese (the one you can see, right?) is starting to brown.

This is what it looks like straight out of the oven:

You know it's going to be good when you can actually see the oil separate and bubble on the sides of the pan.  Is it pretty? No. And it doesn't plate pretty either, hence this photo:

Yes, it looks like cat food. It looks grosser than it did in the can. That being said, this was freaking delicious!!! My lord, it was orgasm good! Well, maybe some of my past lovers just left a lot to be desired but good lord this was good! I had two helpings and let Sally Mae clean my plate. She's now in a food coma on my bed. I'm now on the couch writing this five hours later, just coming out of my food coma.

Maybe I should go put that cheese and raw turkey back in the fridge now...

What is this blog about?

Hello beautiful burners!

Welcome to my little blog! This is all about what to do with that cheap ass, disgusting food you don't usually eat but you bought for the playa and didn't eat. Why did you buy it for the playa then? Because it came in a can. Why didn't you eat it on the playa? Because you forgot your can opener or couldn't find it under the piles of fur and fluff. Not to mention you were sidetracked by the smell of bacon wafting over from down the block...

Now you have all this food that you would normally never buy, much less eat. Short of donating it to a food bank what else can you do with it? I myself am on disability, thus very poor and in need of food donations myself sometimes so giving it away is not an intelligent option. Therefore, I shall scour the web, finding recipes that incorporate my $.88 cans of generic "food" and tweaking them to my satisfaction. Or, I'm sure in some cases, not my satisfaction and the dish will go either down the drain or to my cat.

Allow me to make my introductions...

This is me, my name is El. It's an old photo but I look pretty in it so I'm using it :) I've gone through many playa names including Esby, This One and Bootnapper. I've also been with a few camps including PlayaQ, The Department of Mobility and most recently (and permanently, they can't get rid of me now) Videogasm. I'm an eight year burner and the coordinator of the Rocky Horror Picture Show on the playa at Videogasm. I am known to be a fantastic cook (did you get one of my fried pickles on the playa?) and can do a lot with very little. I get very creative in the kitchen and have also been known to set off the smoke alarm more than once. Live and learn.

This is Deb, my wonderful roomie. I will force her to try the creations I concoct, no matter how gross they sound. Luckily, Deb lives off Top Ramen so she gets excited whenever I make anything to share.

This is Sally Mae and her big orange balls. She will be the very happy recipient of anything I make that I can't force down my throat or my roomies. This cat will eat anything and I mean anything. She likes cabbage. Cabbage! She's a furry garbage disposal.

This is my savior.

I am sure I will have more victims as the days wear on but this is our core taste-testing group for now. 

So grab your dusty leftovers and your Pepto! It's time to cook some cheap ass playafied food!